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How To Affair Proof Your Relationship

On the Home page of my website, you’ll find a welcoming introduction to the pilgrimage of psychotherapy. As I reread this introduction, I saw something I hadn’t seen before. I invite you to read the following paragraph of my introduction and substitute the word marriage, or however you term your committed relationship for the word […]

Affairs of the Heart – Affairs in the Making

Although our relationships “take place” in public, outsiders know little about the intimate environment we create with another person. No one has continuous access to our intimate relationships, not our closest friends, relatives, or many times even the children who live with us. What’s more, we actively generate privacy by giving our various publics only […]

Smart People, Dumb Choices

If you have trouble reading other people you may find yourself confessing at some later date,  “I wish I had known then what I know now?”  Read this outloud, “It was knowable then, where were you?” Lasting and fulfilling relationships have this in common, true information.  The more reliable the information, the less likely we […]

The Sixth Sense

In the 13th century a now famous Sufi poet – Jelaluddin Rumi wrote a poem entitled The Guest House in which he claimed that “This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor.” Rumi went on to encourage […]

Uncommon Sense

Modern affluent societies provide a paradox of choices. More choices make us not freer, but more paralyzed, not happier, but more dissatisfied. More is less.   Practical wisdom is an antidote to a society gone mad with bureaucracy. Rules often fail us, incentives often backfire. It will take practical, everyday wisdom to rebuild our world. […]

The Stone Cold Truth About Friendship

Tis the season to be jolly, so lift your glass, or bow your heads, the Holiday Season is an intimate time for family and dear friends. By the time you read this article we’ll all be deep in Holiday preparations. Invitations to join in the gaity will be arriving. For those to whom the season […]

Time Limited Nature of the Growing Up Process

During a recent television interview the host asked what I thought the number one challenge facing the American Family today? My response was, “Confusion regarding the time limited nature of the growing up process.” For most of us it is easy to have children; the challenge is raising them. As almost every parent will admit, […]

Today Is Your Life

The most important part of life is living. And the most valuable day of your entire life is today. The value of today is exceedingly high because you have waited all your life for this day. If you are 57 years old, you’ve waited 57 years for this day, today. Life is not what’s to […]

Poking Holes In the Darkness

The tragic recent events of Robin William’s life cause us to pause and realize, those that often entertain us are not entertained. Robin gave us all the things he would have wanted to have for himself. He was comic relief, but he was not relieved. The 1947 Frank Capra Classic, It’s A Wonderful Life, a movie […]

X Marks The Spot

Charles Steinmetz was known as the “Electrical Wizard” at General Electric during the early days of the twentieth century. On one occasion after his retirement when the other engineers at GE were utterly baffled by the breakdown of a complex machine, they asked Steinmetz if he would come back and pinpoint the problem. Steinmetz spent […]